Donkey Teeth: The Uncomfortable Truth About Washington’s Smile George Washington Commanding General, Founding Father, First President Of The United States. The Man On The Dollar Bill. And, By His 50S, The Proud Owner Of Exactly One Tooth. Washington’s Dental Story Is Equal Parts Fascinating And Grimace Inducing. He Began Losing Teeth Young — Theories Range From Cracking Nuts With Them (Yes, Like An Actual Nutcracker) To Damage Caused By Mercury Based Medical Treatments, Common At The Time. However It Happened, The Result Was The Same: By The Time He Took Office, His Famous Portrait Worthy Jaw Was Almost Entirely Artificial. His Entire Denture Balanced On That Single Surviving Tooth — Until Even That Gave Out. Constantly Strained And Perpetually Painful, It Was Eventually Pulled. Washington Gave It To His Dentist As A Parting Gift. The Dentist, Clearly A Man Who Appreciated History, Sealed It Inside A Medallion Like A Relic. Now — About Those Donkey Teeth. 18Th Century Dentists Weren’t Working With Modern Materials. They Sourced Replacement Teeth Wherever They Could: Monkeys, Horses, Donkeys, Walruses, Elephants. Nothing Was Off The Table (Or Off The Animal). But Here’s The Thing — No Matter The Source, Dentures Of That Era Were A Disaster. They Cracked, They Shifted, They Made Eating And Speaking Genuinely Difficult. They Were Less A Solution And More A Performance Of Having Teeth. Washington’s Famous Stiff Expression In Portraits? Likely Not Gravitas. Probably Just A Man Trying To Keep His Jaw Together. 😬 As They Say — God Gives You Teeth Twice. The Third Time, You’re On Your Own.
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